I had a bad Christmas eve this year. Early in the morning, had an argument with mum. Oh wait, I shouldn't state it as argument, I should say that I have gone crazy on that day. Everyone has their own method of living. I got mine too, of course. So, don't aspect that how you live yours equal to how I should live mine.
Let me ask you. After you wake up in the morning, you want to settle down your things first but then there's someone keep on nagging on you NON-STOP, how do you feel? Do you feel irritate or annoying or you feel so happy being nagged by someone right away you wake up? Blame always put on me. Bad, naughty, disobey and *you name it* always call on me.
Stop comparing me with another person. I am ME! She is she, he is he! If you aspect me to be like another person, then that is not me! I got my way to handle things, I got my way to express myself and I can't do everything in a short time. I'm still studying and don't aspect me to have a bunch of money. Money don't fall from the sky. I thought family happiness or whatever regarding family is the most important but what I can see in you is money. I just need you to understand me physically and mentally. I got my limit. On that day, I really reach my patience limit. I'm totally burst out and gone crazy. But all I get is silence and cold from you. There isn't any comfort or words from you. At that moment, I was thinking, do I really belong to here or not.
Now I only know what I did is equal to zero. What I bought for you is nothing. What meal that I treat you is nothing. You will think that I'm using your money to buy for you. I always stay at home to accompany you but you don't realise it yet you always complain that nobody talks to you. Come on, that 'nobody' is them or me? Why do I always get scold and nag but actually I am not the cause of it? Why everything pour on me? I'm not robot, I'm human.
I'm so frustrated with all this. I don't know what will happen to me next time if this kind of things occur again. I really feel like packing my stuff into a luggage bag, go to buy an air ticket to any country and just fly away.
5 more days and we are going to step into a brand new year. 2012. A year that I will transform into adult officially. I really HOPE and WISH that 2012 will brings a better year for us and everyone.
BYE.
